You know what they say: if it’s too loud, you’re too old.
But what about the loudest people in music?
Will they, too, one day be heard banging on the roof with an old broom handle screeching at the kids above to “turn down that racket!” and typing long, cantankerous emails to their local supermarket complaining about being disturbed by the noise from the overhead PA while shopping for their adult diapers and bulk packets of doilies?
Look, it could happen. Age devours us all.
And to try and achieve a more scientific insight into what some of our favourite musicians might look like when they’re as old as our nans, the fine people at Loudwire used the app Oldify to digitally turn some top international musos into wrinkly old prunes. Funnily enough, Keith Richards – hilariously – showed no signs of change when adjusted to age 100, or even 152.
Inspired by that (and not at all because we like to spend ages fucking around on hilarious mobile apps during work hours) we’ve also turned the app on some of Australia’s finest talent, to interesting results.
Check out the projected pics of a bunch of Oldified musos in the gallery above.
Music Icons As Old People
-
Courtney Love
Sagging celebrity skin. -
Shannon Noll
Still a sick c*nt at 60. -
Flume
Still got it. -
Marilyn Manson
Has evolved into Alice Cooper. -
Su Metal (Baby Metal)
Not such a baby anymore. -
Dave Mustaine
Rusting in peace. -
Vance Joy
Closest thing to Michelle Pfeiffer that we've ever seen. -
Bruce Dickinson (Iron Maiden)
Could still kick your ass. -
Peter Garrett
Definite Voldemort vibes. -
Dami Im
Aging like she does everything: gracefully. -
Dave Grohl
Probably still playing 3 hours Foo Fighters sets at his local nursing home -
James Hetfield (Metallica)
Enter oldman. -
Axl Rose
Looks a whole fucking lot like current day Eddie Van Halen -
Ozzy Osbourne
Grandma, is that you? -
Flea (RHCP)
Looks like the kind of guy who'd yell at you at a bus stop. -
Kylie Minogue
Hair still on point at 80 years of age. -
Guy Sebastian
These battle scars don't look like they're fading. -
Scott Ian (Anthrax)
100 years without shaving. -
Gene Simmons
HOLY FUCK KILL IT -
Keith Richards
Left: now Right: aged 152
