Don’t freak out. You’re going to freak out. But try not to freak out, because a mystery website has appeared on the internet triggering rumours that legendary US rap-rock band Rage Against The Machine are about to make a comeback.
The website – prophetsofrage.com – has launched a countdown, along with the hashtag #TakeThePowerBack.
Very literally CALM LIKE A BOMB, the countdown is scheduled tick down to zero at the end of the month and potentially blow our collective minds with RATM reunion news.
The internet is naturally losing its unholy shit at the thought that Rage could make a possible tour or music release announcement.
And, as The Music reports, fuelling the fire is the fact that – if you subscribe to the new website – you’ll instantly be shot back an email that reads, “Clear the way for the Prophets of Rage. The party’s over summer 2016”.
Now, take a minute to breathe and let’s be rational about this.
As Amplify points out, Prophets Of Rage also happens to be the name of an RATM tribute band. But it’s also the title of a Public Enemy song. So this could lead us to believe that:
a) we’ve all been suckered in by a tribute band’s marketing stunt and are about to have our hearts royally shat upon.
b) RATM are coming back and touring with Public Enemy (!!!)
c) It’s actually all to do with Public Enemy and nothing to do with Rage
c) It’s something else entirely
We will say this though: Not only did bassist Tim Commerford recently say that RATM might reunite, but posters of the Prophets Of Rage website’s defiant logo have been spotted all over the band’s hometown of LA:
Has anyone seen these mysterious posters appearing around Los Angeles? #TakeThePowerBack https://t.co/UhG07gziJz pic.twitter.com/UomEzhRR5u
— FlippenMusic (@flippenmusic) May 17, 2016
AND RATM-sanctioned fan-based Twitter account @RATM has also gotten in on the action:
https://t.co/75MECE1j0j #TakeThePowerBack pic.twitter.com/CqGGIGK9Z9
— Rage Against The Machine ★ (@RATM) May 17, 2016
And when you think about it, the time has never been more ripe for Rage to make a resurgence.
We’re currently living in a world that is more under threat than it has ever been before from the greedy interests of the rich and powerful. The people who try to convince us that climate change is a scam, who slash funding to education, health, aid, and the arts while pushing through policies that benefit their big corporate donors and grant tax cuts to the rich. *cough* 2016 federal budget *cough*.
And that’s just here in Australia.
Our bros over in the US are staring down the barrel of the terrifying possibility that Donald Trump – a born-wealthy celebrity sociopath who wears his sexism, racism and homophobia like a badge of honour while confusing the darkest day in America’s history with the name of a popular convenience store – could legitimately be elected President.
Apparently Rage even predicted this would happen, according to guitarist Tom Morello:
#RATM predicted Donald Trump's candidacy: https://t.co/ESD3fCCkeA
— Tom Morello (@tmorello) May 18, 2016
And yet, simultaneously, the music on our radios is the most chilled that it’s ever been before. Feelgood pop tunes, dancefloor bangers and delicate indie jams, right? No anger or frustration anywhere. No rebellion, no fire, no “Fuck you I won’t do what you tell me.”
WHERE THE FUCK DID ALL THE ANGRY MUSIC GO?!?
Rage Against The Machine are like the dragons from Game Of Thrones. They’ve been extinct for so long that they’ve almost become a myth, but just before the world is about to be destroyed by undead ice zombies, they reappear to *hopefully* save us all and usher in a brighter and more utopian future.
And raise some fucking hell doing it.
Winter is coming, people. But hopefully, so are Rage Against The Machine.
And possibly Public Enemy. What do you reckon? Could this be another hint?
Rage Against The Machine – Bulls On Parade – Live At Finsbury Park, Lond… https://t.co/JB3o9KaupZ via @YouTube
— Chuck D (@MrChuckD) May 17, 2016
UPDATE 19/05/2016: A source has revealed that Rage Against The Machine will reunite without Zach de la Rocha. Instead they will be joined by Chuck D and B-Real from Public Enemy and Cypress Hill respectively.
UPDATE 19/05/16 2pM: OK so here’s what’s actually going on with Rage Against The Machine.
9 Times Rage Against The Machine Totally Took The Power Back
9 Time Rage Against The Machine Stuck It
-
That Time They Stuck It To MTV
Who could forget that time bassist Tim Commeford climbed the stage set at the MTV Awards after Limp Bizkit won best video, illogically beating out RATM's clip for 'Sleep Now In The Fire' where they actually shut down the New York Stock Exchange in the middle of trading? If that's not rock n' roll I don't know what is. (Photo by Kevin Mazur/WireImage) -
That Time They Stuck It To Wall St
Speaking of that time they shut down Wall St, remember that time they shut down Wall St? Playing on the steps of the New York Stock Exchange as part of the Michael Moore directed clip for 'Sleep Now In The Fire', the band shut down the market after they and fans bum-rushed the exchange. Seriously though can you imagine them trying this now? They'd all be locked up in Guantanamo Bay. -
The Time They Stuck It To Guantanamo Bay
Speaking of Guantanamo Bay, the notorious site of mass torture in the name of the American Dream (FREEEDOM!!!) wasn't ever going to evade criticism from the band, who in 2008 played a number of shows in orange jumpsuits with black bags over their head to protest the US continuing to use the site. (Photo by Greetsia Tent/WireImage) -
That Time They Stuck It To The X Factor
Speaking of torture, remember that time Killing In The Name Of was the UK Christmas number 1? Finally putting an end to Simon Cowell and Stepford singers from the X Factor's domination of the holiday charts. Donating all the funds raised from single sales to charity, the band treated fans to a free show in Finnsbury Park to thank them for standing up to the dominance of corporate music. (Photo by Andy Sheppard/Redferns) -
That Time They Stuck It To Censorship
Speaking of music so bad it probably should be censored (not that RATM would support that) remember that time the band played naked with black tape over their mouths to protest censorship? (See told you they'd be against it). Unfortunately we can't publish images of the band nude, but that's just like real life, as the band themselves were pulled off stage after 15 mins. (Photo by Lindsay Brice/Michael Ochs Archives/Getty Images) -
That Time They Stuck It To SNL
Speaking off the band having their performances cut short, remember that time they had their second song pulled from Saturday Night Live after hanging upside down American flags over their amps in protest of Republican Presidential Candidate Steve Forbes? A symbol of distress, the upside down flags earned them the ire of producer Lorne Michaels and have never been invited back. Yeah they did that, what legends. (Photo by Lindsay Brice/Michael Ochs Archives/Getty Images) -
That Time They Stuck It To The Democratic Party
Speaking of the band having run ins with presidential candidates, remember that time they played outside the Denver Democratic Party Convention, then led a march to force Obama to discuss the Iraq with Veterans Against The War? Who says all musicians do is bitch and moan? (Photo by Doug Pensinger/Getty Images) -
That Time They Stuck It To The Donald
Speaking of future presidents, remember that time they parodied/predicted Donald Trump running for the presidency of the United States of America? Part of the video for 'Sleep Now In The Fire', the sign is clearly meant as a joke to highlight the close ties between corporate America and the government. Somehow though I think even Rage weren't cynical enough to foresee just how popular he would be. -
That Time They Stuck It To The BBC
Speaking of obscenity (or its human form e.g. Trump), remember that time they said fuck all over BBC Radio 5? Invited to perform 'Killing In The Name Of' on the Radio 5 Live Breakfast Show as part of the campaign to get the song to number 1, the band decided they weren't going to do what the producers told them, ironically including the song's final refrain of "fuck you I won't do what you tell me!" Fuck yeah. (Photo by Steve Eichner/WireImage)